The following poem is in response to Victoria’s Wednesday Writing Prompt, “Memory” from her magnificent blog, Live to Write Today.
My dad’s oldest sister had eight children: 3 girls and 5 boys from two different marriages. The cousins closest to me were the five youngest (4 boys and one girl). This is about the oldest boy, who served most of his life in the military but had a weak heart. He suffered many health problems and died prematurely. He was about my older sister’s age. When I was younger, he and his brothers scared me with their boyhood vigor and rough-housing.
I wrote this poem the day after I went to visit him in the hospital. He died within a month of my visit.
Ransom
Lorna, April 9, 2006
He was a giant,
This cousin of mine, and he scared me.
I was young and shy and squat.
The only truth I knew about boys was to avoid them.
And he was a good one to avoid.
He had an impish grin that began in his eyes.
That smirk spilled miles down to his feet.
When I saw it, I knew to expect mischief.
And I ran for cover.
But there was little cover to be found,
When my boy cousins decided to make chase.
In the hospital bed,
He still looks like my giant cousin.
And I am scared again.
Gone is his impish grin,
His face camouflaged by an oxygen mask.
He won’t be chasing me,
Of that, I have no fear.
He is firmly bound to the bed.
A snake’s nest of plastic tubes,
Drugs that dull his world,
And a plastic mask against which he battles
With what little strength he can summon
all keep him captive.
Safe.
But from whom? Not me.
The mask that gives him breath silences him in every way.
Binding him to the hospital bed is
A cadre of his siblings and me,
Holding his ashen hands to keep him from
Pulling at his medical shackles,
Stroking his head, back, arms, any place
That is not invaded or bruised to calm this
Former soldier, now kidnapped by his own body.
My little girl fear is gone.
A mature, compassionate fear wells up in its place.
Today, my fear comes from his pain,
Of knowing boy, then man, now prisoner.
In games we used to play,
Unfortunates like me who were neither swift nor clever,
Were captured by the skilled strategists and athletes,
Like my giant cousin and his brothers.
But today, he has been captured.
This is no game and it has gone too far.
What price is his ransom?
None of us in the room know.
And all of us in the room know.





Jan 28, 2012 @ 13:53:13
I wonder if I should share it with Jay or Robin…
Jan 27, 2012 @ 19:05:46
Great Poem and you made me cry. I loved him so much. He was a great person and I will always miss him. Love you. 😦
Jan 25, 2012 @ 10:48:27
It was a sad sight.
Jan 25, 2012 @ 07:55:57
sad and expressive …
Jan 23, 2012 @ 14:43:34
Thanks Phil. Yes, When I saw my cousin, his pain cut straight through my heart. 😦
Jan 23, 2012 @ 14:41:31
Thank you. The circumstances were unnerving.
Glad you stopped in and commented. Thanks!
Jan 23, 2012 @ 09:25:56
Powerful piece, Lorna.
Jan 23, 2012 @ 08:06:32
Clearly a piece straight from the heart – so very touching.
Jan 23, 2012 @ 05:39:11
I guess we just never know what tomorrow will bring. That’s why I try to live fully each moment.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
Jan 23, 2012 @ 05:36:15
I don’t know how you be the bedside of someone who is suffering and not be profoundly impacted. My heart goes out to you.
Jan 23, 2012 @ 05:26:08
Thanks, Gayle. It’s hard to watch such a big man get so small…
Jan 22, 2012 @ 23:13:46
When you spoke of the fear you had as a girl, I thought of my brother who tormented and teased us sisters until we were crazy! You told such a vivid story of this “giant” man and how he affected you in so many ways.
Jan 22, 2012 @ 13:52:25
Thanks, Mom will be glad to read your poem. You honor Johnny well. Thanks for being there for him.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 18:31:40
This affected me, having seen my husband in a similar situation; fortunately, his “ransom” arrived in time. Not so for my son–
Jan 21, 2012 @ 17:24:41
Very touching. We should live for now because eventually tomorrow is not going to be a kind one.
Tim
Jan 21, 2012 @ 16:46:42
He certainly had a strong will to live–all the operations he had proved that. But by that stage in his decline, I think he was tired of the fight.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 16:44:09
Thanks, Al. When I re-read it, all the emotions and visual images came pouring back. It was hard to see him that way.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 16:43:09
Certainly, Ruth. I never shared with any of Johnny’s family, not knowing how they’d feel. But I’m not trying to keep anything from anyone these days, as you well know!
Jan 21, 2012 @ 16:41:59
Thank you. It was a deeply moving experience.
Jan 21, 2012 @ 12:36:40
Deep and beautifully written.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 19:11:45
Lorna, thank you. I wish I could have been there with you to honor our soldier cousin. May I copy your poem to share with Mom?
Jan 20, 2012 @ 18:53:31
What an excellent way to release the fear and anxiety that we all feel in those circumstances. I think it’s great that you honored him with that poem.
Beautifully written.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 17:14:04
Reading this, Lorna, I’m sure he felt your compassion. The last two lines are power-packed.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 15:08:56
Thanks. It was so visceral. I had to get it out of my head and this was the only way to do it.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 15:08:16
Yeah, I’ve done that before, too. No need to apologize.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 14:26:16
Oooops. I meant Lorna! Sorry.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 14:25:02
This is so sad, Tammy. You’ve written such a good description of the scene in the hospital. Sadly so.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 13:51:07
Those were the feelings I left with. 😦
Jan 20, 2012 @ 13:50:15
It was both haunting and scary to see a once strong, vibrant man so incapacitated.
Jan 20, 2012 @ 13:35:14
I agree with this, this is pretty much what I was going to say
Jan 20, 2012 @ 12:56:28
Good imagery, haunting and scary.